Craig Johnson's Karate USA

What does Love mean?
   
A group  of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, “What  does love mean?” 
 

The  answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone
 
could  have imagined. See what you think: 
  
“When my  grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over
 
and  paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her  all
 
the  time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.”
 
Rebecca-  age 8 
   
When  someone loves you, the way they say your name is
 
different.  You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.”
 
Billy -  age 4
 
 
 
“Love is  when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on
 
shaving  cologne and they go out and smell each other.”
 
Karl -  age 5
 
  “Love is  when you go out to eat and give somebody most of
 
your  French fries without making them give you any of theirs.”
 
Chrissy  -age 6
 
 
 
“Love is  what makes you smile when you’re tired.”
 
Terri -  age 4
 
 
“Love is  when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she
 
takes a  sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.”
 
Danny -  age 7
   
“Love is  when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired
 
of  kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy  and
 
Daddy  are like that. They look gross when they kiss”
 
Emily -  age 8
  
“Love is  what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop
 
opening  presents and listen.”
 
Bobby -  age 7 (Wow!)
   
“If you  want to learn to love better, you should start with
 
a friend  who you hate,”
 
Nikka -  age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka’s on this planet)
 
 
 
“Love is  when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he
 
wears it  everyday.”
 
Noelle -  age 7
 
“Love is  like a little old woman and a little old man who are
 
still  friends even after they know each other so well.”
 
Tommy -  age 6
 
 
 
“During  my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared.
 
I looked  at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and
 
smiling.   He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.”
 
Cindy -  age 8
   
 
“My  mommy loves me more than anybody . You don’t see anyone
 
else  kissing me to sleep at night.”
 
Clare -  age 6
 
 
 
“Love is  when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.”
 
Elaine-age
 
 
 
“Love is  when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still
 
says he  is handsomer than Robert Redford.”
 
Chris -  age 7
   
 
“Love is  when your puppy licks your face even after you left
 
him  alone all day.”
 
Mary Ann  - age 4
 
 
 
“I know  my older sister loves me because she gives me all her
 
old  clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.”
 
Lauren -  age 4
 
 
 
“When  you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and
 
little  stars come out of you.” (what an imagination)
 
Karen -  age 7
 
 
 
“Love is  when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t
 
think  it’s gross.”
 
Mark -  age 6
 
 
 
 ”You  really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it.
 
But if  you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.”
 
Jessica  - age 8
 
 
 
And the  final one — Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once
 
talked  about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the  contest
 
was to  find the most caring child.
 
 
 
The  winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor
 
was an  elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing  the
 
man cry,  the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard,
 
climbed  onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked
 
what he  had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, “Nothing, I  just
 
helped  him cry”   

Awesome.

Let’s set a goal to make as many mistakes as possible, mistakes from which we can learn

 Our favorite story regarding mistakes comes from a quote by Thomas Edison. Edison’s goal was to find a suitable filament to make the incandescent electric light a viable device.

 ”I have not failed 700 times. I have not failed once. I have succeeded in proving that those 700 ways will not work. When I have eliminated the ways that will not work, I will find the way that will work.”

 Too many times we start something difficult, get bogged down because the problem seems too big, and either promise to work on it later, or quitting outright. We need to keep in that our greatest successes come from staying committed to a difficult task and believing our abilities to patiently find a solution no matter how long it takes or how much work needs to be involved.

 Hang in there!

Lesson of the Week.

“Tough times never last but tough people do.” We all have to deal with adversity, from the mild and mundane to the catastrophic. What strengths do you possess that can get you through the stressful times in your life? Try building your C.O.R.E.

 C=Control

What is everything beyond my control?

What can I influence?

 O=Ownership

Where and how I can make a positive impact?

 R=Reach

What the worst that could happen?

What is the best thing that could happen?

What steps can I take that will maximize the positive and minimize the negative?

 E=Endurance

What do I want life to look like when I’m past this adversity?

 More often than not, we are more effective in handling the really big challenges in life over the small ones. More than likely, it is because we are hard-wired for flight-or-fight responses when taking on the big things, whereas the small things are just irritations that cause us to procrastinate and leave undone. If a tornado comes and knocks a tree onto our garage we somehow find the resolve and go into action, but if our printer happens to run out of cyan it is just a major pain in the neck that takes us a week to get to store for more ink.

 In the book, ‘The Adversity Advantage,’ Paul Stoltz and Erik Weihenmayer outline seven ‘summits’ that provide you with the tools to handle any adversity.

“When we do more than we are paid to do, eventually we will be paid more for what we do.”

A farmer had several boys and he worked them extremely hard around the farm. One day, one of the neighbors pointed out that it wasn’t necessary to work the boys that hard to raise a crop. The farmer quietly but firmly responded, “I’m not just raising crops, I’m raising boys.”

A way we can have ‘permanent employment’ is by teaching ourselves from the very beginning to give our best, and then some, to become the go-to person for our teammates and our boss. When we show up early for work, stay late, do the very best we are capable of doing, and do it with an enthusiastic smile, we are making ourselves irreplaceable. When we learn new things to do and take on additional responsibilities, sooner or later it will come our employer’s attention.

I learned that lesson from a man who only went to school through the 8th grade. He married at 19, worked in a factory, and then was able to buy a small dairy farm that included 140 acres for crops. He and his wife raised 6 kids on that farm. When he retired at age 65, he moved into town and took a job as a janitor at the local middle school, even though he suffered from arthritis.

When he passed away he and his wife had accumulated an estate that added up to a tidy sum. He didn’t win the lottery, or build a new invention. He just worked, steadily day in and day out, and he was indeed irreplaceable

He was my grandfather, and he passed his work ethic down to his son, my dad, who is still working in his 70’s, and he to me. 

Our schools have rules against bullying, and punishment for those who break those rules, but it still happens. Our teachers and parents will give the best advice to us on what do to if we are ever teased or picked on, but how we handle it deep inside is our responsibility.

If someone is picking on us and sees that we are bothered by it,  they will keep it up.

If we ignore them, maybe they with leave us alone and maybe they won’t.

If we tell them to stop, they may listen to us, but maybe they won’t.

If we are fed up and tell an adult, like a parent or teacher, they may

 get the message and go away, and maybe they won’t.

If we stand up and confront them, there is a good chance they will

 stop, but sometimes they won’t.

Every situation is different, and so is its solution. However, one thing

 always stays the same…

The bully wins when we let him get ‘under our skin’.

So what is the answer?

Self Defense against a Bully

The best defense against anyone who disrespects us is

Mental Self Defense. What is that? Mental self defense is when we refuse to disrespect ourselves. We do not allow ourselves to be a victim.

 We know we are good people, and nobody can hurt us unless we

 allow them to do so.

We have friends and family who love us because we love ourselves and we use our minds to respond rather than react.

 Instead of becoming angry or sad and letting the bully win, we use our smarts to understand that they are just trying to control us and make us feel bad. The moment we stop allowing them to do that is the moment we are in control of our own lives and not someone else.

 Final Note

Bullying, unfortunately, is a part of life. It has been around as long as there have been people. Remember David and Goliath? Bullies come in all shapes and sizes. Even though it is comforting to dislike or even hate a bully, we need to remember that he probably learned that behavior from someone else, and he is just taking it out on us. Since we wind up feeling awful, what do we often do? Find someone weaker and pick on them, and so on, and so on.

So what can we do? Remember that anyone can be a bully, even us. The moment we stop respecting others and seeing them as people just like us, and start treating them as less deserving of respect, then we are a bully too.